Never before in my life would I have thought that there could be a question so common yet so very painful to be asked. “How many children do you have?”. Every time I hear that my heart sinks and I get a pain in the depth of my stomach. “Well, I have three children. But, well…ummm”…I hate what comes next. What comes next is the other person’s guilt. The instant sad facial expression, the guilt of bringing up such a tragic and sensitive subject. I always feel bad -for- the person. People have said that’s silly of me, but how can I not feel terrible for them? They had no idea! The question itself is inoccent. The answer,ore difficult then one could imagine. There’s a part of me that wants to run and hide when ever I’m asked that, and then sometimes I want to lie and say three and then stop right there. For once I wish I could say three children and tell them how beautiful they all are and how great they are doing! And then again, I often wonder if people think I say it to get sympathy. The fact is, I have thought about this over and over. And bottom line, when I’m asked how many children I have, there will NEVER be a time that I don’t include Arianna in that answer because she IS my child and she deserves to be recognized. She existed. Arianna was here.
And in the end, I believe that’s what it comes down to: Arianna was here. Arianna made me and her father laugh and smile . She loved us and we loved her with everything we had. Arianna is loved. And she will love on forever I’m our hearts until the very end of time.